I'm just sitting here, thinking of the emotional rollercoaster I've been throug the past few days. I'm just sitting here thinking back about how the last time I saw some people, I never knew that would be the last time I saw them. Sometimes, it's not a bad thing. Sometimes, it hurts like crazy to know that you're never going to see them again. People let silly things come in between the people they really care about.
Just think about it...is it really that serious to hold a grudge over something? It's not. Everything can be taken away in an instant. Someone could be taken from you; you could be taken from someone. Personally, I don't want to leave anyone behind with the thought that I didn't love them, or I didn't care. I don't want anyone to leave me behind with those same thoughts, either.
I just find it crazy how someone you are so close to can just drop you and barely bat an eye. Just let you go so easily. What if something happens...when something happens. You will never get to tell that person the truth because of your own stubborn pride. I'm not sure where I'm going with this. I just find fighting very pointless. Maybe that's why I no longer want to fight. Maybe that's why my focus is now on my family and the friends who won't leave me. The friends who know there are more important things than making everyone happy.
I'm sick of always worrying about this friends situation. I wish I could just erase it from my mind. I can't. All I can think about is the last time I saw this person...and I can barely remember it. There's so much people don't say when they should...and so much people say when they shouldn't. I honestly think if more people lived as if it were their last day here, the world would be a better place. Stubborn-ness and pride wouldn't exsist. Less people would end up hurt.
Like I said, I don't know where I'm going with this. It's more like a stream of consciousness so bare with me.
I guess, I just want to wake up every morning knowing that I did the best I could. Knowing that if something happens to me everyone I love knows that I love them. Knowing that if something happens to anyone else they know that I love them. I don't want to let silly things get me down anymore. Life is WAY too short for all the drama, name-calling, being mean, lying, backstabbing, pride, ignoring people. Life is WAY too short to be stupid. It's meant to be enjoyed...not meant to make you cry.
"LIVE as if you'll die today...dream as if you'll live forever."
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